Raising The Bar

The last time I went to a bar was well over 6 years ago. It was my “I’m going to rehab party”. I had to report to a rehab center as a condition of my probation. It was that or go to prison to finish out my 2 felony counts of 2-20 years.

I chose rehab.


I got disgustingly drunk that night off of whatever was put in front of me…..which not only included booze but various other illegal substances.

I barely made it to the check in for the rehab center before a blue warrant was put out on me.

And that was the last time I was in a bar.

Until last Friday.

I journeyed to the great city of Chicago for a wedding.

The pre wedding party was at a bar. This particular bar was closed down for regular business to accommodate the wedding party, family and friends. Roughly 60-70 people.

The floodgates to “Booze-a-palooza” were opened at 7 pm.

2 words-


Final tab- $7500

Complete sentences were hard to come by after about 9:30.

Me….I indulged with 1 coca cola…on the rocks….sans the straw.

I am not sure if that was on the tab or not.

Day 2-

The wedding was beautiful. I cried….. It was my sister that got married….therefore I was allowed to.

After the champagne toast ( I had a lovely Sprite in one of those fancy flutes), cocktail hour began.

2 words-


It was a great weekend for those whose indulge in the spirits. The booze just kept coming.

Of course as the night went on the music began to change from-

Dinner music to Billy Joel to Guns and Roses to 2Pac.

Nothing like seeing women over 30 do the Axle Rose dance or white men over 30 act like Gangsta rappers.

Alcohol has that effect on some.

Next came the rooftop party at the hotel.

Without going into too much detail here are the high (or low)lights of the fiesta-

-one of my family members was refused entrance into the party for bring too drunk….my sister gets him in about an hour later….he then gets booted out for being too drunk.

-one of the grooms friends, drops his pants and urinates on the bar……then falls into a glass table. He doesn’t get kicked out and the table is quickly replaced with another glass table.

-the previously mentioned family member is wandering the streets of Chicago in a drunken stupor texting other family members telling them it will be their fault if he gets murdered while wandering the streets of Chicago.

At 6:30 a.m. I receive a call from said family member asking if I can let him in.

He survived the streets of Chicago with only shame and embarrassment to show for it.

My drink tally for the night-

I sprite
1 coca cola
2 glasses of water
1 cup of coffee

Day 3-

Brunch at a patio bar….

The events of the night before are the joke of the day.


Are the drinks of the day.

Me…I got Starbucks before brunch.

That pretty much sums up my experience at “booze-a-palooza”,

I had fun with the family that I hadn’t seen in a while.

My sister now has a new last name.

And I have my first experience being in a bar sober.

And that experience reminds me why I remain sober.

It’s still good2begone


I sure am glad 2 be home.