Trying To Catch 22

My teenage stepson is, has been, and forever will be looking for love.

He is currently 17 going on divorced with child support to as many females that will accept his penis in them.

Ok…so that may be a bit extreme.

There are a lot of yets to consider.

He is not married…yet.

No one is pregnant….yet

Therefore, no divorce and no child support…yet.

That’s not for a lack of trying on his part.

In the last 8 months he has proposed to 3 females that we know of.

Got caught in bed with one of them.

He has dated females in his grade (11) and females in grades below (9).

And is currently “hanging out” with a 22 year old that he works with.

My first 2 questions are-

What does a 22 year old want with a 17 year old?


Does he even know what to do with a 22 year old?

The answer to question #2 is no…..but he is putting in lots of effort into finding out.

This past Saturday, he came home at his scheduled curfew, which is midnight.

(He told us, that once he got off work, he was going to his friends house to play video games.)

He came home…..with his work shirt on inside out.

My wife says,

“Why is your shirt on inside out?”

He sputters for an answer as his face turns bright red and says,

“I changed clothes when I got to (insert friends name here) house and then I guess I put my shirt on wrong when I left.”

We just stare at him.

“So….” I begin.

“You want us to believe….that you went to your friends house….changed clothes to play video games….AND THEN….changed back into your work clothes to come home?”

He begins to storm out while saying,


I have strange suspicions that his “friend” is the 22 year old he works with…..and the game….

“Tune in Tokyo”.


I make jokes…..but this is a serious matter for my wife and I. Our son is almost old enough to legally make decisions for himself…..


She is well above the age of consent.

Parenting is not easy. The adorable children grow up fast and want to grow up faster than they should.

Sometimes, we, as the adults and guardians have to make choices and decisions that do not sit well with the growing child but are for the betterment of that child.

We really are not sure what to do.

I have heard it said over and over and over-

There is no manual that comes with the kids when they are born.

We just do the best we can.

A manual sure would come in handy, though.