The Pickpocket Putback Principle

The pickpocket pilfers the pockets of the plenty,
placing packages onto his person to please his perverted pleasure.

Podering perhaps that his pathway to pain is predestined,
He proceeds to place packages pointlessly INTO the pockets of pedesrtrians and passersby.

Thereby pouncing the predicament of prison….

Say all that 10 times fast…but just watch the video once.

I know I am not much of a poetry person, but please be polite….

For some reason I gotta go “P”.


Texting Bee

Here is a list of replies I have received from messages sent to my step daughter-

1- k
2- ya
3- omg
4- no
5- ttyl
6- wutev

Of the 6 listed, one represents an actual word. In case you are not sure which one it is, that would be number 4. As a parent I am currently on the lookout for a book titled-

“Texting for parents who were taught how the English language is supposed to be used, but have been forced to raise children who believe that punctuation, spelling, grammar, proper word usage, and face to face communication skills are a thing of the past”

For the texting crowd, naturally the title would be-


Thanks for listening

Pinterest for Men

Pinterest is kinda girly….sorry but it is. I had a problem that a glue gun and some glitter just could not fix.
My favorite pair of shorts tore during a construction incident. Yup, further proof than i am a man. I build stuff… With tools n stuff….anyway I needed to fix these shorts. I couldn’t just get rid of them…. That would be a travesty to favorite clothes wearing people everywhere.

So I fixed them. Man style.


Like preserver

I have had an account with Facebook for a couple of years. When I first started using it it was great. The whole reconnect with people you haven’t even thought about since high school without ever having to talk to them or see them in person kind of thing is right up my alley. Seriously, if I actually wanted to be in contact with them I wouldn’t have lost contact with them in first place.
My friends list hovers around 200 people. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Im about to start tossing them all off the boat and go back to my island of perfect solitude.
The novelty is wearing thin. What began as posting about way back when, where are you know, how have you been, do you still talk to so n so, what have you been up to, why did you move, has morphed into something the ship’s captain didn’t tell me about.
For the last month or so, the majority of my page is loaded up with pictures of people in emotional poses with quotes plastered across the middle of them. I don’t care about any if this. What I care less about (but am baffled by) is that some of these pics have over 300,000 likes attached to them.
At first I was torn between following the obvious “Flock of Facebook Likers” and just ignoring it…..but they just keep coming….and coming….and coming. It has taken the like right out of me.
Then it hit me… Like the Titanic hitting the iceberg. I am being bombarded with the Facebook version of the chain letter. I don’t like it. And the “Likers” can’t make me like it.
The chain letter was carried on by whoever decided to repost to 20 people what was posted to them…thru the mail. I am proud to say that I am not a reposter. And if bad things happen to me because I never reposted a post that was requested to be reposted, then I accept my responsibility as a non-reposter.

You can quote me on that….thru a post…but only if you like it first.

No TV? No problem…for me

I believe that I am kind of an anomaly in today’s world where media and the entertainment industry are doing their best to shape the future. I say this for a couple of simple reasons.

1- I don’t watch TV
2- I don’t go to movies

Simple enough? Allow me to elaborate….or should I give you time to time to stop hyperventilating from the prospect that someone actually does this.

I used to engage in both activities. TV is very time consuming. Movies are very money consuming. I never put any thought into life without either because zoning out for hours at home or paying to zone out for a couple of hours is what is done to “relax” and get away for a while. The problem for me was pretty much all movies are predictable. Paying to find out what I knew was going to happen didn’t make sense. Watching life on TV got old after I realized my life happened more that 1 hour a week (per each mind numbing show). Seemed like wasted time to me.
I haven’t had cable or satellite or network TV in about 4 years. I Haven’t gone to the movie theater in over 2 years.
To be honest we have Netflix at the house I have watched a few shows but that ceased about 8 months ago.
My life has enough drama, comedy and reality already. I find no need to get mentally involved in some that is made up.
My idea of family time is not all of us huddled around the screen watching scripted lives being led. The fact that I am the only one in the house who thinks this is…..well it is what is.
People I work with always ask, ” did you watch this last night?” or ” Are you going to see this movie on Friday?” my reply is always the same. Inevitably all I hear about all day is about what I’m missing by not watching this show or that movie. Then they send me emails with links from You Tube about whatever they watch and quiz me on it after to make sure I am somewhat part of the flock.
Hear is one final thought up leave you with. Have your paper bag ready in case the hyperventilating starts back up.

I. Read. Books.