Chest Bumps

by good2begone

Men are pigs and I blame numbers for that harsh, yet quite possibly true, genderistic accusation.

In order for me to be specific, as to avoid being misunderstood, I blame the invention of the calculator and the advancements of technology that have occurred since then.

To be as clear as a set of fortune teller crystal globes, I blame the numbers pad on the calculator which later led to the keypad on the telephone which led to the digital pager that led to the cellular phone that blossomed into actual text messaging that made us, of the male persuasion, forego all codes of mystery and just succumb to the aforementioned accusation that we are pigs.

I have no doubt that a man created all this technology.


It was the woman who has advanced it over time and has achieved the technological advances that we have today.

The advances made by man are all dedicated to the pursuit of clarification on why the thought of 2 makes us giggle and the possibility of unhooking the clasps that restrain have the uncanny ability to release thoughts that can change even the most sophisticated of the male gender into a drooling zombie with glazed over eyes.

It all in the numbers….

If I haven’t paired up the answer to why men are pigs with my touch of history and image….

Be a man…do with it like we have done with everything else and turn it upside down.