I am not one to get sexually aroused by clowns or balloons or clowns with balloons or balloons shaped as clowns, but, hey whatever air you need to float your love boat, then inflate away.
I make this confession because of a story I came across while clowning around the internet news sites this morning.
Not only is this couple taking time out of their busy schedules of cramming them and their friends and all their private parts into small cars and getting cream pies in their faces, they also make tv appearances to promote their ER visits in order to deflate their clown vaginas…..
Ahhhh…the looners have landed.
Here is the story-
“Balloon Sex Really Blows For Kinky Clown Couple“-David Moye of The Huffington Post
A kinky couple who thought it would be fun to clown around with balloons had their sexual expectations blow up in their faces, according to the emergency room physician who had to treat them.
Dr. Leonard Herman said the couple came to the hospital in Norristown, Pennsylvania, because the woman was having breathing problems.
They were both dressed as clowns.
“The husband said, ‘My wife and I were in the heat of passion and she says to me, ‘Treat me like a balloon,'” Herman said on an episode of “Sex Sent Me To The E.R.”
It turns out the woman was a “looner,” a term for people who are sexually aroused by balloons. The man told Herman that he tried to satisfy her desire by blowing air into her vagina.
Herman had never seen this type of case before but figured out that the woman’s breathing problems may be due to an air embolism caused when her partner blew the air into her private parts.
“[When] an excessive amount of air is introduced into the vagina and gets absorbed, [it] causes trouble breathing,” he said.
An air embolism is a potentially serious problem, according to Herman.
“It’s the same as cutting off the circulation at the lung level,” he said. “Air gets into the circulation [and] lodges into the lung where it blocks the normal flow of blood causing, obviously, a lot of serious problems.”
As uncomfortable as the woman was, the amount of air blown into her vagina wasn’t lethal and her body eventually absorbed it.
Herman did have a warning for the couple though: “Be more careful about blowing up people.”
A ER doctor cracking jokes to clowns about their balloon fetishes.
One small step for man…
One giant leap for clown kind.