The Security Questions Con Queso

by good2begone

Customer service is there to provide help and provide answers to the problems of the customer.

I am a customer. I needed help with an issue.

The issue was detailed in my last post called “The Security Questions

I have been a loyal Apple iPhone customer for over 5 years. I purchase and use their products. I upgrade to their newer products. I buy music from their online music place, ITunes.

I had to call customer service to hopefully resolve an issue.

Here is how it went…..

From my iPhone, I had to input my phone number, email address, name, and account email and hit send with the promise that I would receive a call in under 2 minutes.

My phone rang in under 30 seconds,

So far…so good.

The obviously young man had a head cold. He constant sniffles were the dead give away.

He apologized for my frustrations with the process and asked how he could be of service.

My tension was eased a bit.

I began,

“I can’t buy anything with the card I purchased because the system is asking security questions to verify my identity. I haven’t had to do this since I opened the account over 5 years ago. I don’t remember the answers….and when I tried to go in to reset the questions I couldn’t because I had to answer 2 more questions that I could not answer…k so….how can you help?”

“Well, sir. That is the number 1 issue that we have to deal with. The newest upgrade has caused the issue and we are working around the clock to fix it.”

“K….so….can you get this fixed so I can use the balance that I upped yesterday.”

He pauses for a moment. Sniffles, then replies.

“Yes, I just need you to be able to answer 1 out of the 3 security questions correctly to confirm your identity.”

I paused. Presses mute in my phone and threw a tantrum complete with screams.

20131104-192719.jpg Then hit mute again to reply.

“This call is bring recorded right?”

“Yes sir, for quality assurances.”

“Do me a favor then and rewind this call and listen REAL CLOSELY to the reason I called in the first place.”

“I can’t do that sir. We really just need to answer 1 of the 3 and I can get you back on track….”

“Listen here, snuffleupagus, if I could answer the security questions I would not of had to call you in the first place. But here we are. And all you can tell me is what I already know. And that is….that I don’t know the answers to the security questions and I can’t utilize your service without them.”

“Yes sir.”

“K…so…unless I somehow remember the correct answers, I can’t utilize the balance and you can’t help me.”

“That is correct.”


I couldn’t slam down the receiver….because it is an iPhone and the glass would break….So I just hit the end button really hard with my thumb and yelled the word click.

Still have a balance I can’t use.

It is now my mental security that is in question.

Stupid Apple.