The Zombie Run

by good2begone


Crap.

Why do I always say yes to doing things without thinking?

It’s a gift. That’s my answer.

My boss asked me, via text message, if I would willing to participate in a 5k Zombie Run with him in October.

By the “crap” to start out the post I obviously enthusiastically said yes.

(My brains have already been taken and the race is not even for a few months.)

The dealio is this-

I don’t run…..unless I have done something illegal and am being chased.

It’s a pretty simple motto I live by.

It’s the “no sirens, no exercise theory”.

I haven’t had to run in almost 7 years.

Maybe…I went sleepwalking and broke a mirror and coincidentally my luck has run out.

Regardless, I said yes. So I should be committed…I mean… I am committed. (Stupid auto correct).

I have run in a 5k before.

ONCE

I was in rehab. There was a 5k recovery run and I was able to participate.

It was August, 2006.

I was not, nor did I own proper running attire….I was in rehab and basically indigent.

I ran the race in jeans, a t shirt, and tennis shoes that were too small.

I did pretty good in my category, which was aptly named

“Guys over 35 who haven’t had 3 meals a day or seen sunlight in over 4 years.”

I think I would have won a trophy. If it wasn’t for my narcoleptic running mate that kept falling asleep while we jogged

“Hey, wake up! You are ruining my time!!”

…that and girls in running shorts…I thought it was better to be behind them than ahead of them.

Give me a break…it was the first time I had seen with clear eyes in a decade.

I still don’t own running attire.

My shoe collection consists of 6 pairs of Converse All Stars….various colors for various occasions.

20130805-213925.jpgNone suitable for running from anything.

So, I gracefully ask any and all running blogging gurus to help a guy out.

What do I need.

I don’t do spandex, by the way.

You know who you are. You happy exercising sober running bloggers you.

Without help..I will be caught by a zombie while I’m being distracted by donuts that spectators will be eating.

20130805-213527.jpg

Advertisements